An excerpt from Return to Metal Town

Here’s a very first drafty excerpt from Return to Metal Town. This was one of the short stories that came to me during the Clarion West Write-a-thon. If you’d like to sponsor me, my write-a-thon page is here

Next week, I’ll post a first drafty excerpt from the novel in progress. 

Excerpt: Return to Metal Town

An alternate child will be a good addition to your home. Memomach industries works to create the perfect child to suit your needs. 

-Memomach Industry ad- 


Father wears the face of a numbered man. He wears the suit, he carries the briefcase, he drives the car.

 At home, he morphs into someone Mother argues with over their dinner.

 “I don’t see why you feel the need to indulge him,” Mother says.

 “He thinks it will be a good experience, and I agree,” Father replies.

 They are discussing Adventure Boy’s desire to visit Metal Town.

 Mother doesn’t wish them to go, but Father sees no harm in it.

 “I don’t understand why you want to see that place again,” Mother says. “I shudder when I remember how I almost lost you there.”

 “But you didn’t lose me,” Father says. “And we can’t deny him this. If he wants to know it for himself, then he should know it for himself.”

 “I won’t go,” Mother says.

 “If you don’t want to go, you don’t have to go,” Father replies.

 Adventure Boy lies on his back and stares up at the ceiling. He had bought a picture of the Remembrance Monument and Father had hung it from the ceiling. At night, the lines of the monument glowed in the dark.

Mechanic’s words rang in his ear.

“You can still hear the voices of those who have gone before.”  

2 thoughts on “An excerpt from Return to Metal Town

  1. This looks like it’s going to be a really interesting story. Will it still be a short or will it be longer?

Comments are closed.